


Letters Never Sent

by mmmdraco



Category: Free!
Genre: Epistolary, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-20
Updated: 2013-12-20
Packaged: 2018-01-05 06:15:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1090598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mmmdraco/pseuds/mmmdraco
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He writes letters he never finishes, let alone sends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Letters Never Sent

**Author's Note:**

  * For [novembersmith](https://archiveofourown.org/users/novembersmith/gifts).



Haru,

I'm finally settled in here in Australia. The weather is so different than what I was used to in Japan, but it's nice. I get to swim outside more often because it doesn't get that cold in this part and I get to really focus on my form.

What I'm not used to yet are the bugs. They had some flooding recently and all of the spiders came inland. They don't normally bother me all that much, but there's so many everywhere you go! 

This is shit. You don't want to hear from me. And I don't really want to let you know how I'm doing until I'm better than you. Or at least until I figure out why you are better than me.

* * *

Haru,

I got to swim with a wild dolphin today and it made me think of you. I didn't beat it in a race, either, but I got to hold on to its fin as it swam along for a few meters. This is stupid. I've been gone for months now. I didn't send the last one and I'm not going to send this one.

* * *

Haru,

I won my first race down here today. I couldn't help but feel like he wasn't very good, though. I think part of me was just comparing him to you when, really, there is no comparison. 

Why do I keep trying to do this? I'm the one who broke things off to come here to train. You're the one who's supposed to be pining away for me to come back, your one true rival!

I saw another wild dolphin today. Now that my English is better, I can communicate with the locals some. They say the dolphins here can really hurt the sharks if they try.

Damn it. I need to go train more.

* * *

Haru, 

Someone tried to tell me about something called drop bears today. They're some kind of bear that hides in trees and drops on its prey? I think they were teasing me, but I think I'll stay away from the trees a little more anyway. I'm glad I stick to the pools mostly while I'm here. If I'd known how many things here could kill you, I might have just trained harder in Japan.

I wonder how you're doing in your training. Except, you don't even train, do you? You swim because you love it. I wish I knew what that felt like.

I already know this letter is destined to go in the trash like the rest of them have, but when I came here, one of my teachers recommended that I write in my native language sometimes so I won't forget how. I'm not much of a story teller, so that's how I found myself writing to you.

Screw this. My hand is cramping up. My coach got on me about my hand placement during practice today. I won't write anymore letters to never send.

~~I already know I'm lying.~~

* * *

Haru,

I tried scuba diving today. It was amazing. But it's not the same as just swimming. A shark swam really close to me when we were searching the sand for teeth. I've finally begun to make some friends here, but they're nothing like you and the guys. It might be easier if I didn't have to translate everything before saying it. I guess I could spend more time studying, but then I wouldn't have as much time for practice. 

I'm going to beat you one day. Fair and square. I'll prove I'm good enough to stand next to you; to stand tall for my father. I have to. Even though I've been gone this long, I know you'll remember me, too. I know- because I've never forgotten you.

Forget this. I can't take these thoughts today.

* * *

Haru,

I'm coming back to Japan. I haven't talked to you since, well, you know. 

I don't even know which school you're going to. I hope it's the same one I'll be going to. I want to see you again. I've really missed you. 

These letters. I keep writing them and never finishing them and the only reason why is that I want to keep up the illusion in my mind that you'd care enough to write back. As long as I don't give you that chance, you'll never hurt me with it.

So many things hurt, Haru. I never expected to hurt this much, though. I'm coming back and I'll find you. We'll race again and see what happens.

This is the last letter I'm going to write. This one? I'm keeping it. In our next match, if you beat me, I'll give you this letter. It might not mean a whole lot to you, but to me, it means the world. It means I've accepted you, no matter what other circumstances are going on around us. 

Love,  
Rin


End file.
